Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Anthony Weiner Joins the Wet Raccoon Club

Now it's bipartisan. First it was Donald Trump, then New Gingrich, now the Wet Raccoon Club has initiated Congressman Anthony Weiner as its newest member. You know you've become a joke when longtime acquaintance and friend of a friend Jon Stewart makes fun of the size of your penis:

Anthony Weiner certainly has a pubic relations pickle on his hands, with an explanation as flimsy as a pair of briefs that rubs up against a whole sextet of suspicions:

(1) Weiner says his Twitter account was hacked but insists on hiring a private law firm and security experts to investigate, instead of asking the FBI to investigate for free.

(2) Weiner wanted to laugh this off as a prank, but that characterization is consistent with him sending a picture of his junk to a follower on Twitter as a playful prank.

(3) Weiner can't say with certitude that the picture is not him, raising the possibility he was using a picture of someone else's junk to pick up girls, something internet pervs are also known to do.

(4) Weiner has an established modus operandi of using the internet to hit on women he has just met and doesn't know too well, his email overture to a DC staffer just a couple of days after 9/11 was reported back in 2001 in Vanity Fair. And a Saturday night in March he tweeted porn star Ginger Lee who replied, "You know it's a good day when you wake up to a DM from @RepWeiner," Lee tweeted. (I'm a fangirl, y'all, he's my trifecta of win.)"

(5) Weiner claims that the @RepWeiner account from which the photo was tweeted was for personal use, begging the question of why he was following so many young women on that account. The young woman to whom the tweet was sent claims someone started cyber-stalking her after Weiner started following her on Twitter. Weiner may just be a serial cyber-stalker.

(6) Weiner had his marriage last July officiated by Bill Clinton, which strikes me as a little like crossing your fingers when making your wedding vows. And we all know men are most likely to be tempted to cheat in the first year of marriage.

This whole Weiner affair is somewhat tamer than many sex scandals, except that this time there is a picture. Which reminds me that former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer, client #9, should really be inducted retroactively into the Wet Raccoon Club.

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