Friday, September 13, 2013

A Putinized and Atheistized Pledge of Allegiance

With Vladimir Putin twerking America ideals in The New York Times and atheists suing the state of Massachusetts, it's time to revise the Pledge of Allegiance:
I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Here's the rewrite:
I begrudgingly acknowledge the existence of the flag of the United States of America, and the putative republic for which it sometimes stands, one nation still suffering in many precincts under the god delusion, unexceptional and indivisible from all the other nations in the United Nations, with illiberty and injustice all too often. Void if I flee to Canada or Russia. All rights reserved.
Have a happy Friday the 13th. E pluribus unum!


buddeshepherd said...

I finally read the who Putintorial and found it quite interesting.
I find it very uncomfortable to be finding myself on the side of our evil arch enemy.
As I read the article I never thought we would have such an incredibly inept leadership that the USA would get to the point where we are to evil empire and Russia is the not-as-evil-as-the used to be empire.
And then we get to the myth of "American Exceptionalism." No one gets it.
The New World was settled by the best and/or most determined of the old world. You had to have drive or desperation to come here. Many people had very strong beliefs and a desire for freedom and independence.
This drives the ruling classes/elites crazy. I could almost see Mr. Putin rubbing his Gnomish little hands together in glee at the death of American Exceptionalism.
It is just that O is our first affirmative action president and a product of times?
Is there a concerted effort to make the USA second class? (Like was done to Great Britain so they could start the EU?)
Is it a conspiracy of like-minded/educated thought?
Is it the judgement of God? Our pride and hubris?
It reminds me a Hollywood production of Jeremiah or Hosea only we drop the prophets and keep the hookers...
AND, whenever I hear Mr. O talking tough I keep getting the soundtrack of Michael Jackson singing, "I'm Bad," is his high pitched voice is it Cartman I'm hearing? Am I really sleeping and dreaming I'm in a South Park episode?

buddeshepherd said...

I meant to say, "I finally read the whole...."
I should be working but I'm setting in the house watching it rain on my @#$%^&* hay...
Not a #$%^&* thing I can do about it...

buddeshepherd said...

Dear Comrade,
I started out to complement you on your revised pledge which much more sensitive to the nuances of a post 20th century understanding of the emerging americanistic non-ethocentric view of the future.
But, I got off subject